Every Arthur needs his Merlin

POSTED IN Stories June 21, 2015

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Every Arthur needs his Merlin

Life is a puzzle, if one asks me. I cannot speak for every human on this planet, but for me, the one and the only me, life is a puzzle. I have been trying to make some sense into its pieces since I know myself, but every time I seem to put together as a whole some of them, something new appears like not fitting into my big design and then I wait for another piece, and another piece. But, this is normal, isn’t it? If my puzzle were to be ready, my life would be at its end, I guess. Are there people whose life goes perfectly and smoothly from the beginning until the end? I remember that Omar Khayyam defined life as a “chess game of Destiny”.
“But helpless pieces in the game He plays Upon this chequer-board of Nights and Days He hither and thither moves, and checks … and slays Then one by one, back in the Closet lays.”
The Destiny is playing chess alone and we, the humans, we are all mere pawns on his chessboard. He moves us, he decides our winnings and losses, he throws us in the box of nothingness once he gets bored by the game. Then, what choices do we have? Why bother then to wake up in the morning, to go to work, to worry about our well being, knowing all along that everything we do it is predestined, it is previewed? Is it fair? Is it true? Is it acceptable?
The brightest minds of the world seemed to share over the centuries the same definition of life as Omar Khayyam.

Seeing life as a puzzle it appeared more appealing to me. At least in a game of puzzle I’d have the right to see the pieces and the liberty to arrange them as I think it fits.
I know, some people desire strongly to make their puzzle perfect from the first try. They even push some pieces into fitting, although it might be not their right places. They ignore the mistakes in their puzzle, and this can be seen later, and cannot be fixed unless one destroys the whole puzzle and starts from the beginning.
Some are brave enough to accept the challenge; some are afraid and continue their flawed puzzle until it is too late. This is my definition of life. I know, it is lacking the idea of “I build my own future, I am the master of my own fate”, but I really do not believe in this. I believe that we might have the power to learn from our mistakes, to accept what is given to us and not to fight evil fights, to do good, no matter what.
I believe also that some things are beyond our comprehending and, sometimes, we might not have a saying in the matter, and we should not push life harder than possible, we should just take a breath, because, I also believe that, in the end, every piece will fall into the correct place.
I never planned anything to happen, I never thought about the future, worrying and carefully thinking what shall be done step by step to achieve my goals.
And yet my goals became reality, no matter what obstacles I had to overcome. And Lord, didn’t I have! I trained myself into the curiosity: “what tomorrow brings ?” and I know that it is not in my powers to change the course of events.
“Everything happens for a reason “, another cliché I hear around me. I do believe it is true, despite the “cliché formula” of the saying. At least in my case it is 100 % true. Everything I did or did not do in this life stormed a chain of happenings, who built in the end the puzzle I find myself staring at right now. People get tired, grow apart, stop talking, never talk, trust, mistrust, imagine things the way they want to be, refuse to see things the way they really are, cheat, are faithful. All of these pieces of the puzzle called life one day find their correct place and take a shape which we might like it or we might not. I for one refuse to refuse the reality. I refuse to replace the talking in my life with text messages, emails, virtual presence, polite presence, absent presence, conventional presence. I talk. I watch people in the eye and say words, even if I feel that that makes people uncomfortable. The moment will come, when people will realize that talking face to face it is not a disease, it is not contaminating, it is not tiring, it is only human. I hug people, even if I know that not everybody likes it. I tell people how beautiful they are, how wonderful they are, even if sometimes it seems to be inappropriate. Maybe I refused some pieces when I accepted to play my puzzle.
We all need to believe that every Arthur needs a Merlin. I learned from my books that the truth comes from the mouth of fools and children.
I have learned, playing my puzzle that life is worth living. Life is beautiful. Life is a gift to be opened every day, a little bit at a time.

 

 

Maria Magdalena Biela